Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Fantasy Football...The Stakes are High

Hi sports fans…

I’m With Stupid Sports Director, Slyder Balzcock here with your, I’m With Stupid Fantasy Football League Playoff Preview.

The IWS Fantasy Football League is entering its playoff portion of the season, and the four finalists have been determined through a bruising season of virtual pummeling of one and other on the fake and computer generated frozen tundra of Gumbo Field.

Ten teams entered the foray back in September, and in the championship round, only four remain.  And they are…

The Flam-a-diddle Cheesy Poofs, Seal Team 6, The Stalkers, and The Steel Reserves.

Let’s break down the potential action of this virtual gridiron, four mano on four mano steel cage match.

Weeks 14 and 15 pit the #2 seed Seal Team 6 up against the #3 seed Stalkers…

Seal Team 6 coached by Docnolz plays a style of football emblematic of his devil-may-care, I’ll sleep with anyone personality.  He’s got rookie sensation, Cam “I’ve Played Football for Money Before” Newton at QB, and Beanie “I Didn’t Do Shit When I Was on the Steel Reserves” Wells at RB.

Seal Team 6 goes up this week against a team in the Stalkers that has broken every leg of every RB known to man.

Coached by our very on Jayman, The Stalkers have seen Darren McFadden go bye-bye…Seen Fred Jackson go bye-bye…and yet, they persist.  And now?


They count on Ben Jarvis Green-Ellis at RB to get a few carries from the playbook of Bill Belichick.  One game he may get 15 carries, 115 yards, and 2 touchdowns…the next game, he may sit the bench in lieu of Danny Woodcock, or Woodchuck, or Woodwhatever...

Belichick is wacky that way, but through grit and determination, Jayman has captained his team through the waters of adversity and found himself on the Isle of Playoffs.

The first game in this match-up of college cheaters and broken legs?  Too close to call, although I hope Jayman wins…It is very unbecoming when he weeps.

Next up, the regular season champ Burl G and his fancy dancey Flam-a-diddle-Cheesy Poofs against our other very own, Matt-Man and his Steel Reserves…

Burl had the best record in the regular season at 10-3 with Aaron Rodgers at QB and Matt Forte at RB, however, Forte is injured now, and during Christmas season Burl is probably conducting Christmas concerts, so he may be a bit distracted.

And well…He may also be distracted by his HOT wife…

I know I would...anyhoo...

Matt-Man and the Steel Reserves started out on a drunken rampage going 6-2 and managed to stay just sober enough to finish 3-2 down the stretch to get into the playoffs.

Funny thing about Matt-Man and his team…When he goes with is regular line-up, he wins.  When Matt-Man tries to act like a real coach and tinkers and deviates, he loses.

Here’s a little advice from Slyder to Matt-Man…quit listening to those “intuitive voices” in your head, and you may finally beat Burl and the Flam-a-diddle-Cheesy Poofs.  If Matt-Man can turn a deaf ear to his coaching epiphanies, it’s Steel Reserves by a whisker.


So there you have my IWS FF Playoff Preview, and don’t forget, Jay and Matt-Man broadcast live today at 11:00 AM EST on Blog Talk Radio.

In addition to the regular fun and frivolity, they have an important announcement to make, so make sure you tune in.

This is Slyder Balzcock leavin' it all on the field and headin’ to the showers…

You can contact Slyder at:

neshobadude@yahoo.com
http://twitter.com/MattManIWS

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